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PostPosted: Fri Jul 12, 2019 12:37 pm 
Riccardo Patrese
Driver ID: #103
Car Number: #24
Joined: 11 Jan 2019
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Newsflash

The world of IndyCar is in uproar this morning after the formal entry for team Indystructables was inadvertently changed to "Handbags at 12 paces" on all formal promotional material. It is believed this was a move by rivals to unsettle the team after a very public spat between high profile driver pairing, Flouncy and Eradicator.

When contacted for comment series promoter, Veedub Racing Inc. issued the following statement.

"The unfortunate change was clearly the rogue actions of one individual and have caused great embarrassment. We are in the process of legally removing the individual from all executive responsibilities. They may speak for themselves but their views are not those of the company. This ludicrous action by minority shareholders cosy with Team Shake n Bake & Team WTF is risible. Their attempted palace coup has failed. We control all of the assets of Veedub Racing Inc. & have support of all key stakeholders"

More to come on this Storey as it develops.


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 12, 2019 12:37 pm 
Jochen Rindt
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Driver ID: #10
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Joined: 02 Oct 2013
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Veedub wrote:
Now how on earth did that happen? :twisted:

:lol:

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"Grosjean is a human asparagus. Mildly satisfying but thin and weak." - Flouncy, truth speaker.


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 12, 2019 12:47 pm 
Alberto Ascari
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Car Number: #666
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Well played Veedub. We also announce Rich Energy as the team sponsor.

So we gonna formally change it to Handbags at 12 Paces? Or have you still got a carrot up your arse about the car colours?

I've looked up the word 'compromise' that you mentioned earlier, and am now prepared to let you be the boss of the team name seeing as I helped us score a respectable colour scheme. Fair's fair.

e: fixed to show I realised it was Veedub's clever joke, not Mark's. As if.


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 12, 2019 4:28 pm 
Jochen Rindt
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Per our agreement, you may refer to me as Batman.
And Batman does not carry a handbag.

We are The Indystructables. Our cars will bring fire and doom to all others who dare challenge us! 8-) :twisted:

Let's do this
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Apologies to Mr Lambo for the extra work.

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"Grosjean is a human asparagus. Mildly satisfying but thin and weak." - Flouncy, truth speaker.


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 12, 2019 4:51 pm 
Alberto Ascari
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Car Number: #666
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BREAKING:

The clown car of confusion that has seen confident front runners the Indestructables disintegrate before our eyes in just 24 hours has taken a new, sickening turn.

Like a bank robber wearing a scary stocking over his head, and then tearing it off in horror if it somehow suddenly caught fire, the thin varnish pretending to hold the team’s seemingly endless self-destruction in check has melted entirely away.

Furious scenes were reported as team points hope Flouncy allegedly disrespected reserve driver eradicator in an embarrassing incident while they were both meeting the Queen at the annual Mightiest Avenger in Sport Awards.

“Green, seriously?!” Screamed fifteen-times World Champion Flouncy at a shocked server holding a plate of cucumber on white bread slices.

Team junior intern eradicator then allegedly stepped into the fray, insulting Flouncy with a comment disparaging his appearance. Flouncy responded with a clever 'no, you are!', and it was on.

At a press conference the following afternoon both drivers reaffirmed their commitment to the team and its important sponsors, and Team Lead Flouncy agreed to call the other guy Batman from now on.


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 12, 2019 6:00 pm 
Alex Yoong
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Driver ID: #108
Car Number: #99
Joined: 03 Jul 2019
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Stunub and captainleather will be forming the team Transcontinental in the #19 Dale Coyne livery (red, white, blue) looking to turn big pings into big points!


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 12, 2019 6:53 pm 
Alex Yoong
Driver ID: #63
Car Number: #2
Joined: 24 Mar 2018
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Flouncy wrote:
BREAKING:

The clown car of confusion that has seen confident front runners the Indestructables disintegrate before our eyes in just 24 hours has taken a new, sickening turn.

Like a bank robber wearing a scary stocking over his head, and then tearing it off in horror if it somehow suddenly caught fire, the thin varnish pretending to hold the team’s seemingly endless self-destruction in check has melted entirely away.

Furious scenes were reported as team points hope Flouncy allegedly disrespected reserve driver eradicator in an embarrassing incident while they were both meeting the Queen at the annual Mightiest Avenger in Sport Awards.

“Green, seriously?!” Screamed fifteen-times World Champion Flouncy at a shocked server holding a plate of cucumber on white bread slices.

Team junior intern eradicator then allegedly stepped into the fray, insulting Flouncy with a comment disparaging his appearance. Flouncy responded with a tasteless Mum joke, and it was on.

At a press conference the following afternoon both drivers reaffirmed their commitment to the team and its important sponsors, and Team Lead Flouncy agreed to call the other guy Batman from now on.


The WTF Team's 's new Communications Director Anthony Scaramucci would like to wish with hand on heart, Team Indyincontenence drivers Poncy and Flatman all the best for the coming season.
As they will certainly need it.

The WTF Team would like to deny any responsibility for the struggling teams troubles.
Comms Director Scaramucci, who is thought to be on a short term employment contract could not be found for further comment.

As a sign of good will, The WTF Team has sent the drivers of Team Indyincontinence a box of mostly unused (with very little risk of infection) pacifiers. Courtesy of Seb Vettal.


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 12, 2019 11:25 pm 
Riccardo Patrese
Driver ID: #103
Car Number: #24
Joined: 11 Jan 2019
Posts: 242
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Eradicator wrote:
We are The Indystructables. Our cars will bring fire and doom to all others who dare challenge us!


Image

Oh, it's on. Prepare to be shaked and baked!


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 13, 2019 4:25 am 
Takuma Sato
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Driver ID: #6
Car Number: #38
Joined: 08 Apr 2019
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Newsflash:

A relative unknown rookie driver Chigerama and his freshly founded team has stated their intent to join the Indy championship for season 6 this year. Unfortunately he's embarrassingly turned up at the launch event without a teammate, or even a complete car.

He has been quoted as saying "I'm sure we can build the car, and our success, over the season." However leaked financial information indicates that while the team has purchased a collection of parts, is likely to miss the first part of the season due to logistical and design issues from suppliers. The team principal however has publicly stated that this wasn't the cause for the delays and dismissed two theories regarding the delay:

"A couple that I read were that there were issues with external suppliers. That wasn't the case. Or that financially we were in a difficult position and that had an impact on car build. It didn't."

While not wanting to elaborate further on what were the real causes of the delay, they said that the effort required to create an car from scratch should never be underestimated.

"I think we take for granted sometimes that we're going to get one car to the test track and two cars to the race track," they added. "But we still build, or design and build our race cars in-house, in their entirety.

There are 22-odd parts to a car, which we have to design, which we have to manufacture, which we have to assemble, which we have to put through crash testing etc, and that's an enormous job. And we just didn't make it for a number of reasons."

The team said it was important the investigation into what went wrong exposed all the factors that contributed to the problem, so as to ensure that the team did not risk being late with its car again.

"There has been some work started, but it will probably take a few weeks to fully compile that, and we have to get it right because if we don't get the review right, then we're not going to get next year's programme right."

Within the document leak was included some diagrams on the current state of development of car design that Chigerama and his team are working with. The team refused to comment.

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<end>

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PostPosted: Sat Jul 13, 2019 9:03 am 
Luca Badoer
Driver ID: #111
Car Number: #66
Joined: 10 Jul 2019
Posts: 18
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Looking forward to it. These Indy cars are a bit of a beast but enjoying the tactical challenge. I will try my best to make each race but the little one may put a stop to some. Dam that real life getting in the way.

Is the practice / pre season still going ahead this Sunday?


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 13, 2019 9:20 am 
Alberto Ascari
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Car Number: #666
Joined: 01 Oct 2013
Posts: 2850
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Yep warmup round this Sunday!


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 13, 2019 10:37 am 
Luca Badoer
Driver ID: #111
Car Number: #66
Joined: 10 Jul 2019
Posts: 18
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Flouncy wrote:
Yep warmup round this Sunday!

Ripper!


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 14, 2019 10:30 pm 
Alberto Ascari
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Car Number: #666
Joined: 01 Oct 2013
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Car 35 please. It's the good one Mark.


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 18, 2019 9:59 pm 
Jacky Ickx
Driver ID: #114
Car Number: #777
Joined: 18 Jul 2019
Posts: 150
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I'm keen to sign up, hope you are not all alien's :)


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 18, 2019 11:22 pm 
Riccardo Patrese
Driver ID: #103
Car Number: #24
Joined: 11 Jan 2019
Posts: 242
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VikRacer wrote:
I'm keen to sign up, hope you are not all alien's :)


Welcome, consider yourself signed up. Plenty of aspirational aliens, but in reality just mostly normal homo sapiens of varying speed depending on how much we've practiced.

First track up this Sunday is Imola, look they're to seeing you there.


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 20, 2019 11:40 am 
Riccardo Patrese
Driver ID: #103
Car Number: #24
Joined: 11 Jan 2019
Posts: 242
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Hi All.

Hope everyone is gearing up for what's shaping up to be a good season, and getting some practice in before tomorrow night.

I will be assigning teams to all drivers (not already assigned to teams) first thing tomorrow morning. If you are already in contract discussions with another driver to form a team can you please update this thread before end of day so I can take that into consideration.

Cheers
Veedub


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 20, 2019 11:45 pm 
Riccardo Patrese
Driver ID: #103
Car Number: #24
Joined: 11 Jan 2019
Posts: 242
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Teams updated.


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 21, 2019 12:20 pm 
Jenson Button
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Hey Veedub, put me in a team that is slow and unreliable that way we can always blame the machinery... ala like Mclaren circa 2015-18

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 21, 2019 2:55 pm 
Sebastian Vettel
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SHAKE IT!....BEFORE YOU BAKE IT!!


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 21, 2019 3:04 pm 
Riccardo Patrese
Driver ID: #103
Car Number: #24
Joined: 11 Jan 2019
Posts: 242
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I had a look, but unfortunatly the #66 Mclaren livery didn't make it into PC2. In lieu of this I put you in in a red car/ team, as it has been statistically proven that red is slower and less reliable. :)


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